Mama Designs Quilted Playmat

It's hard to know what to get a 5 month old for Christmas, especially if that 5 month old is the third child. We were just going to count his monkey music classes as his Christmas present. He'd never know, we don't need any more plastic and he loves monkey music. But then Mama Designs came out with this luxury quilted play mat a couple of weeks before Christmas and it looked so good I pre-ordered it.

Mama Designs is a company I've been aware of for sometime but only since having Jim (in the middle) so I've had to just resist its lovely temptations. But the playmat spoke to me. And for so many reasons.

It's a great size. It doesn't take up vast amounts of room, it's not so much fabric that someone of 5'2" struggles to lift it, you can pack it in a bag or the back of the car and it barely takes up any space. It comes with a storage bag with a drawstring so you can pack this away and store it somewhere - it will stay clean and ready for use and fits easily into the bottom of a suitcase.

We have 2 dogs, a metric ton of lego and quite a lot of jewellry making beads. Before Jack was mobile it was so nice to be able to put this down on the floor and know that he was sitting or lying somewhere clean and that was just his. Even the big brothers learned that this was a lego-free zone. When it arrived, before he could sit up it was so great to be able to put this down on the floor and lie him on it without having to worry about how clean the floor was.

Play Hooray

Claire at Play Hooray is a friend in need to tens of thousands of mums on Instagram - providing much needed inspiration and encouragement to keep the TV off and find a creative way to play with children aged 0 to 8 years old. What she does, and especially her Play Prompts, have been massively helpful to me so I wanted to share my experience. With a pack of her play ideas in my nappy bag or a print offs stuck on the fridge, I'm never at a loss for something to do on a rainy day.

Like a lot of other people I first discovered the lovely Claire via Giovanna Fletcher's Instagram feed. Some may think that being a mother of three means I know what I'm doing with children and in some ways I do but my god entertaining even one of them is so difficult sometimes, two even harder, two whilst pregnant and trying to have some semblance of a normal life was just incredibly frustrating and almost impossible. Now I have three at quite different ages 5, 2.5 and 8 months and so quite often I feel like I'm aiming at three different levels.

Which is where Play Hooray comes in and frankly, saves the day (whilst making you a little bit angry that you didn't come up with it first). Claire is an Early Years Teacher which in terms of nursery and pre-schools in the UK is the be-all and end-all. As a mother of one she decided to create some prompt cards for those days when you are stuck in the house with no idea how to entertain your child without switching on TV. She decided to get some cards printed to see if they sold, they did and she now has a full range of different prompts and products available some of which I've bought and have been using.

Matchstick Monkey

I've had a pretty easy run of it on the teething front. There have been red cheeks, horrid nappies and a few grisley days but on the whole it's not been as horrendous as it could have been. There have been times when I've tried to get the boys to chew on something as it must offer such relief but I have never found anything they were really into - even world famous Sophie the Giraffe held the interest for a mere 5 minutes and has spent the rest of the time being retrieved from the dogs bed.

Kit & KIn

The launch of the Kit & Kin nappies pretty much coincided with the launch of my third baby and this time round my postpartum anxiety had me obsessing over plastic. And not just plastic. Waste in general. The thought of nappies, worn by me as a baby, still existing somewhere made me feel sick and I realised my usual plan of ignoring it til someone else fixes it was exactly the problem. That and supermarkets not giving up plastic bags altogether and sorting out paper ones but that's a whole different issue.

I've researched reusable nappies but with two children still wearing them it seemed pretty much like a full time job and a huge monetary outlay for something that may well not work for us. I'd tried Naty and though I love their, occasionally flimsy, biodegradable bags, the nappies always sprung a leak. So I ordered a pack of newborn nappies from Kit & Kin for Jack to test drive. At the time of writing this review Jack has been wearing them for 7 months.

I have to say I love the design and the packaging. Looks great, arrives in a cardboard box (unfortunately delivered by Hermes who aren't that reliable but I know that posting stuff is hard nowadays). We get the Tiger ones but you can choose from fox, bear and panda. They are really sweet and so easy to tell which way round they should be when you are frazzled.

Jack Dominick Andrew Harrod

I realise he never got a post like his brothers so here he is. Born 2nd July 2017

Baby Favourites

These are some of my favourite things I've been using since having Jack. There are lots more that I missed off - like the gorgeous Aden + Anais towel and flannel set I was given which is so lovely - let me know what yours are in the comments below. Probably a bit too much information in here for some - also if I seem to get shorter during filming that's because it's hard with a baby on your knee!

Sleepyhead
Aden + Anais Swaddle Blankets
Aden + Anais Towel
Lil Cubs Swaddle Muslin
Ana Wiz Washable Natural Bamboo Breast Pads ( Mixed, Pack of 12)
Kit + Kin nappies
Natracare Maternity Pads
Multi-Mam Balm
PPOGOO Waterproof Burp Cloths
Marks & Spencer Baby Grows
Breastvest Breast Vest Top
Sock-ons

The Breastfeeding Box

Anyone who knows me or how follows me on Instagram will no that, although I do it as much as I can bear too, I hate breastfeeding. It does not make me feel bonded to the baby, it makes me feel a strange combination of resentful, trapped, inadequate and like a cow. I do it because I can and there are lots of women out there who would love to be able to and can't and because it is good for them. I am a crap milk maker though so the boys have all had top up bottles when either they, or I, need it. Why they don't recommend combination feeding more often I have no idea. I'm sure if they did more women would breastfeed but to feed a baby when you aren't making enough milk or hate it and feel that it's an either/or option is ridiculous.

Anyway, part of my problem with it is that having been a mountainous pregnant person you are suddenly not pregnant anymore and (eventually) much more able and mobile and yet there you sit, pinned under a feeding baby staring at the mess/washing up/DIY/gardening/whatever and unable to do anything about it. So, pretty quickly with Ned I made myself a breastfeeding box.

Father's Day Gift Ideas 2017

Father's day is a tricky one. Men are so different. We used to take my father out for lunch as he was away working a lot, we lived in London and it was really nice to spend some time together. Also I find with men if they want something they usually get it themselves. My husband has a horror of more stuff being bought into the house having spent the last couple of years sorting through his late father's horded belongings and acquiring two children and the plastic tat that inevitably comes with them. For our anniversary I tend to take him out for supper.

Father's Day though is different. Taking a hugely pregnant wife and two small children anywhere to eat isn't that relaxing and though I'm pretty sure he'd love it if I sent him to the pub for the afternoon I'm not sure that really counts. Of course I'm hoping Ned will create something at pre-school for his dad (I had a beautiful earring dish made) but in case that doesn't happen I have a few back-ups.

Accessories  - I love these skull cufflinks from The Great Frog (all their cufflinks are pretty awesome). I'm also always on the hunt for a vintage silver belt buckle for him but I think I need to go to America to track one of these down. These Gaucho belts look great and go with everything - Joe has the Neopolitan which has lasted for years and he wears it most days.

An Easy Kids 4th Birthday Party

I don't want to sound like a mean mom but I am going to put off spending money on my kids birthday party until I absolutely have to. It will come sooner for my eldest who has his birthday in November. Jim, a June baby, will be having his parties in the garden at home until he's old enough to go to the pub, and then no doubt he will return with his friends, inebriated, to the garden.

Ned and his giraffe cake

It is sort of more effort on your part, they will need entertaining a bit but from my experience there will be a certain amount of over-excited running around and getting every single toy out and onto the floor. This will take up quite a lot of the time as will feeding them anything so really one activity and one or two party games will do for 3/4 year olds. Indeed for Ned's 3rd birthday we just did pass the parcel and let them dash around with a load of balloons and that seemed to do the trick. You don't have to pay a huge amount to a venue and then worry about people turning up and although you do have to do some food prep and the clearing up it has, so far, not been too arduous.

I think either 11-12.30am or 3-4.30pm is a good time for a party. Half my friends prefer the morning as it leaves you the rest of the day to get on with stuff. Half of them prefer the afternoon as it means you can have a lazy morning at home knowing there is an 'activity' in the afternoon. This year we went for the morning as we had it on 5th November and I thought it would give people time to head off to fireworks things in the afternoon. Ned's birthday is actually on 1st November so quite often an afternoon party is better for us if we've been to a Halloween party the day before. 

Childrens Books from my youth

I cleared a box of books from my mums sheds. Recognise any of these?

Bepanthen Nappy Care Ointment and Moisturiser

I was sent a lovely box of Bepanthen goodies to try out on the willing Jim baby. He actually made a very good guinea-pig. He is teething so has quite acidic pee and tends to have dry skin patches on his tummy so both creams were needed.

Speak to any mum and they all have a specific nappy rash cream they prefer to use. I'm a great believer in Sudocrem others prefer Metanium which I've never had work successfully. But Sudocrem is quite thick and icky to apply for every nappy change so I'm afraid sometimes it's only used when redness is already starting to show. But, as with a lot of things there are so many different products to choose from it's easier to just stick with what you know. So I'm really grateful I was given the opportunity to try the Bepanthen Nappy Care Ointment. This cream has a really nice texture - almost gel-like, so it's really easy to apply and your both not inadvertently covered in it by the end of the nappy change. It doesn't contain any fragrance, preservatives colours or antiseptics so it's suitable as a nappy rash prevention cream to be used at every nappy change. The ointment forms a breathable, transparent layer to protect from irritation and rubbing.

The tube is also incredibly easy to use - a flip top lid means you can open and close it one handed which is a massive bonus.

In terms of dry skin again with my eldest I left it until it was a bit late. Only once he had dry skin, mostly on his arms, did I start to apply cream and for him I've always loved Oilatum Junior. I bought stacks of the stuff when Jim arrived and vowed to baste him daily but he still had little dry patches on his tum. These have gone with regular use of the Bepanthen Baby Moisturiser which I try and use every time he gets out of the bath. It has no perfumes or harsh chemicals so it's great for children with sensitive skin and can be used from newborn up.

The moisturiser contains Vitamin B5 which helps to deeply moiturise and nourish the skin and is free from alcohol, colours, fragrances, parabans, lanolin and paraffin.

I would absolutely recommend both of these creams - I'm going to keep Sudocrem on-hand for anytime an antiseptic cream is needed but hopefully this will be a lot less often with the preventative help of the Nappy Care Ointment. Reasonably priced and easily available, Bepanthen works closely with parents, nurses and midwives so they know what they are doing. Their website has a tone of useful information so it's worth taking a look.

What You Need to Know - Bepanthen Baby Moisturiser and Nappy Care Ointment

• Moisturiser is £5.99 for 100ml
• Ointment is available in three sizes £3.99 for 30g, £5.99 for 50g and £7.99 for 100g 
• The Nappy Care Ointment does not contain any antiseptic - it is a preventive barrier cream. 
• Available in the UK from Boots, Asda, Ocado, Superdrug and Tesco

Weaning

Most people spend the entire 40 weeks of your second pregnancy telling you how hard it is with two, much like they spent the whole of your first telling you about all the women/babies they'd know who have died or been seriously disabled by childbirth and in my case, all the major fuck-ups your hospital have made. Now I don't want to sound awful but apart from the first-six-weeks-eating-every-hour-and-a-half fiasco Jim has been a really lovely baby. Yes sometimes he sleeps through, sometimes he doesn't and he throws-up. A lot. All the time. But he smiles, and he sleeps and he's funny and he laughs and his big brother adores him. So I'm pretty smug and lucky over here.

I was told I'd forget how to breastfeed. I didn't. Told that Ned would hate him. He didn't. Told that I would never wash again. I do, even if I have to listen to one of my children being cross with me while I do it. I have, however, completely forgotten how to wean.

Ned was known to be a bit of a screamy baby. Hours were spent bouncing in front of the speakers blasting out Motley Crue, Refused and Jay-Z which was one of the few ways to stop him shouting. But man that boy would eat. Anything in a bottle was downed like a darts player on a tight schedule and when it came to weaning after the initial week of not actually knowing what to do with his mouth he would eat whatever came near him on a spoon. Or in an Ella's pouch. My friends marvelled at my wonder baby and his eating.

Not Jim. He eats. But not all his bottle all the time, not all in one go and I keep forgetting to wean him. Some days he has something then I'll forget for a week. I've had to become really focussed on it and I'm thankful that I signed up to an Abel & Cole delivery box years ago which means that, due to my terrible eating habits, there is always something around to puree. I just can't remember what to feed when, what to do with the bottles, when to aim for dropping one. It's as if all knowledge of how to get your child from liquids to solids has fully left the building. It's like it was never there. So of course, it's back to the books. Re-reading the trusty Annabel Karmel's New Complete Baby & Toddler Meal Planner feels like the first time. It's amazing Ned is not just walking round with a bottle of formula.

I've also bought, on recommendation from a friend, River Cottage Baby and Toddler Cookbook, I'm hoping will give me ideas for things that Ned can eat (whether he will or not...) that I can puree for Jim further down the line. So far Jim's had pear, baby rice and porridge. This afternoon we're having parsnip. Fingers crossed something will come back to me soon.

Baby updates

For those who don't know I have a YouTube channel which is mostly make-up stuff but sometimes baby things sneak in there too. Here are the latest ones about lovely Jim

Newborn...


3 months...

Seraphine Maternity and Nursing Jumper

If there's one thing I hate spending money on it's maternity clothes. If I had my time over I would go out when I was three months pregnant with Ned (2.5yrs), spend some money at Isabel Oliver, Seraphine and Topshop and then that would be it. I'd have good clothes that would see me through however many pregnancies I had. But instead I hated spending money and so didn't, until I really had to and then it's even worse because you don't get as much wear out of them. This time round I got so huge so quickly I had to buy more clothes at around 6 months because I was growing out of everything. Now some these clothes are nearly good as new having only been draped over my massive bulk 2 or 3 times. And I managed to mostly stick to my policy of only buying things you can breastfeed in... otherwise it's wear-life really is limited, unless you know you are going to bottle feed.

One purchase I have never regretted however, is the Seraphine Maternity and Nursing Jumper I bought when I was about three months pregnant with Jim (3 months). It lasted beautifully throughout the whole of my pregnancy and breastfeeding, goes with everything, washes well and is a flattering shape. £49 seems like an awful lot to spend on a jumper that you wear for such a limited time, an in fact it's quite a lot for any jumper but because most of us don't have the money to buy a whole new wardrobe I ended up wearing either this, or another jumper the whole way through my pregnancy so you really do get your monies worth. And I didn't feel fat, or gross, or terrible looking because it fitted well and still does despite having been worn through the extreme ends of pregnancy.

I don't often do clothing things on here - I spend most of my money on make-up and skincare, not clothes (I wish...) but this is something that is really worth investing in.

Baby Day

As the second child (of two) I always maintained you get a raw deal, no matter how much my mother tried to convince me that you love your children the same (I never felt un-loved!) and they both have certain qualities that the other doesn't and are completely individual etc etc. But I still doubted this even as I was pregnant with what would be my second son. How could I love anyone as much as Ned who is so incredibly funny and clever? Then Jim arrived and as the hormones flooded through my body I was worried that this new tiny person was going to replace Ned who was so big and self-sufficient, not small and sweet-smelling and needy like Jim.

What I actually realise is that we were both right. I do love my boys the same, my heart did expand and make room for Jim as everyone said it would (I hate that expression but it works) but my god I don't feel the same wonder I did with Ned. Jim gets moved from room to room, house to pram depending on what Ned is up to and then, when he's at nursery, depending on what I am frantically trying to get done. My two and a half year old and insomnia made sleeping while he napped an impossibility and the fact that I work for myself made me feel pressure to get as much work stuff done as soon as I could after giving birth.

As the weeks passed and I realised Jim was not getting any tummy time, hadn't really smiled (had he?) and I was grinding my teeth through my terrible sub-concious anxiety (related to my depression, often exacerbated by having a baby) and I thought 'the only person who is going to give you time off is you'. It's true. If I say I'm ok to work, then everyone around me will go with it and the older Jim gets the less likely I am to be told to put my feet up. And it's not really about me, yes I love Jim but I definitely feel less bonded to him than I did with Ned at this age, and that's because we never spend that much time together. Because he's nice and quiet when awake and undemanding of me, he wasn't getting the time he deserved.

So two weeks ago I decided that Wednesdays would be me and Jim days. We would hang out together. Yes the odd thing may come up and we need to take Ned to nursery and pick him up but apart from that we are not leaving Chiswick. We'll look at books, chat, cuddle, walk round the shops and in the afternoon we'll nod off together in front of an ITV drama. In a couple of weeks he'll start being left at the gym creche for an hour while I go to the gym and at the beginning of next year we'll start doing swimming lessons but apart from that Wednesdays are ours and so far the difference is already noticable. He smiles a lot and I am calmer and have a day that I really look forward to. This sounds mean, there are lots of days usually but being a self-employed mother-of-two married to a workaholic means that the weeks can merge and everything is a rush.

Because I have named Wednesday's Jim day, I don't try and work, I don't battle against the mountains of laundry and tidying, I don't do face charts and brush cleaning (for those of you who don't know I'm a make-up artist). Instead we look at little toes, blow hot potatoes on his tummy and sing and dance (mostly to First Aid Kit).

I don't want this to sound smug. I just suddenly realised that he was nine weeks and carted around like a bloody heavy handbag and all the time I was marvelling at how the time had flown with Ned. I was so caught up in trying to get everything done and be a working mum that I was neglecting the actual mum-stuff and I can never get that back... Take your time, I think a lot of mum's nowadays are too hard on themselves. Put your feet up and have a good old cuddle.

I used to sing this to Jim a lot when he was a couple of weeks old and feeding every hour or so round the clock - should have listened to what I was mindlessly singing.

UPDATE: The lovely people at the Counselling Directory have asked me to include a link here and in case you need it click here for the specific page on depression. Please, please go and check it out if you need support in some way - it is set up by people who have seen the gaps in the support of mental health.

Staycation

My sister and I keep procreating at the same time. Wonderful for us and our offspring but slightly chaotic and OTT for everyone else involved (especially my poor mother who spends the majority of her time on the M3). Since my father died we have gone on our summer holidays to France at the end of August and beginning of September. Initially to drink bucketloads of rose, smoke Vogue cigarettes and dance around whilst drunk to Tom Petty. Then whilst vast (me not Jess, Jess is one of those people who looks like themselves with a reasonable bump on the front) and ungainly. And then again with cheery 9 month olds who slept through the night and were reasonably happy in a 'baby cage' constructed by their dad's out of plastic fencing (they were fine).

See they love the baby cage

This time we weren't so clever. After a few false starts that would have fitted perfectly with out French holiday ambitions we have now managed to have one arrive in June and one due at the end of August. Yes I may have braved the Eurostar with a 2.5 year old and 6 week old but my sister shouldn't really be out of the country on her due date, even I can see that. So this year we are going to our cottage in Norfolk.

Yes Norfolk. Where the sea is at it's warmest in October and mind-numbingly freezing at all other times and there is usually at least three days at a time of teeth rattling wind a week. And I've managed to book work right on the middle weekend which will involve me, a newborn and my long suffering mother driving to Wiltshire and back...

There are many things that I'm quite looking forward too. It's three hours door to door (traffic permitting). You can take your own car. Shopping for a baby is easy. But I'm going to miss the heat, the swimming pool and the rose. One thing that will be amazing about going to Norfolk, however is the food.

Yes I know that Norfolk isn't necessarily famed for it's food, though samphire and lobster should probably get a mention here, but whilst pregnant I didn't eat any shellfish (prawns are the only thing that I've had terrible food poisoning from) so I am planning on eating my body weight in potted shrimp and seeing if I can get hold of some mussels though I think it's not the right time for them. There are some lovely (ridiculously priced) deli's near us where they sell cheeses that walk home by themselves which again, I haven't eaten for over a year. The fish platter at the local pub is incredible and something Joe and I share when we have a (rare) date night. All of this will hopefully make up for any dubious weather, probable sobriety and average croissants.

I had another baby...

James Alexander Reuben Harrod, Jim, turned up five days late (how rude!) on 2nd June...

Potty Training part 1

I've never felt like I've failed as a mother. I had an epidural, a decision I believe a lot more women should feel able to make, it didn't affect my son and I was less traumatised by the whole thing afterwards which is better for him I think. I breastfed for 6 months but gave him top-up formula bottles from 6 weeks when it became clear that he was a hungry boy that wasn't getting enough. With this next bump I am planning to do top-ups from day 1. He started going to half days at nursery when he was 16 months and has enjoyed it and his speech has improved (his sharing hasn't). He has a dummy which I'm hoping to stop soon-ish and he had a bottle at bedtime until he was just under 2. He still has milk before bed if he wants it and a whole big sippy cup full in the morning, sometimes two.

He's a very happy, I think intelligent, little boy and has been deemed the politest boy the nursery have ever had. I think he is very adaptable to growing up (he accepted the switch from bottle to sippy-cup with little complaint) and is good at letting me know what he needs. So at 26 months when he would repeatedly cry in the mornings and struggle against having a nappy put on whilst shouting 'I don't want nappies anymore' I thought it best to start potty training. Originally I had planned to wait until he was at least 2 ½ so we could get it done in three or four days because he would have a better understanding of what was going on. But he was successfully using the training seat when sat on it and so we went out and chose some Thomas the Tank Engine and Peppa Pig pants and went home to start.

It started well with a few accidents but mostly success but a weekend away from home with certain unanticipated distractions and he completely relapsed. Hated going to the loo and said he wanted his nappies back. Having been a firm believer that once you had started you had to persevere I didn't want to quit but when he was just happily walking around in wet trousers on day 5 having just refused to go to the loo I though 'enough is enough'. I would never have started this early without him wanting to give it a try - it was making me frustrated and this frustration was beginning to show and I don't want this to become an ordeal for both of us that goes on for months.

So he's back in nappies and I feel like a failure. Yes I do think he's too young and I probably should have stuck with that belief. Was I selfish thinking it would be better to get this done before the new baby arrives and we move house? He's adaptable but those are big changes. Will he now be off the whole idea until he's 4 (too old in my opinion though some may disagree)? If he hadn't had a disrupted weekend would he have stayed on track or was success actually just luck because it was just me and him? Though I am always supported by my husband potty training is such a personal thing (many an hour spent playing in the bathroom over the last week) that I now feel very alone with my decisions. I'm not sure how long it will take me to pick up from this.

How to switch a Bugaboo Bee pram from parent facing to outward facing and how to get your kid to sleep on a train

On my other blog I try to do a video every Friday. As it's a make-up and beauty blog I don't put the videos up here very often but one of my most popular videos is about my pram (typical) so I thought another one may be useful...

Hampton Sun SPF 70 for Kids

Slightly scary photo - still working out my new camera!

We have just been on a much needed holiday in France and, as Ned has inherited my fair skin,  I was really worried that he would get sunburn and so spent some time hunting around for suitable sun creams for children under 12 months. There's a lot to choose from and I took a couple with me but my favourite was definitely Hampton Sun's SPF 70 for Kids. It's not cheap at £33 (but you really can't put a price on your child's health) and the ease of the spray on application and the lovely smell made that rather steep price tag totally worthwhile.  In fact it was so easy to apply he was positively giggly about having it put on which made a nice change from the angry shrieking that usually ensues and it was so much quicker.

I reapplied this at least every 80 minutes when he was outside and we used it on nephew sometimes as well - there was still some left over and no evidence that he'd been in the sun at all (not a nappy tan line in sight). Highly recommended - I'm going to buy a bottle of this at the start of every summer.