4 February 2015

Potty Training part 1

I've never felt like I've failed as a mother. I had an epidural, a decision I believe a lot more women should feel able to make, it didn't affect my son and I was less traumatised by the whole thing afterwards which is better for him I think. I breastfed for 6 months but gave him top-up formula bottles from 6 weeks when it became clear that he was a hungry boy that wasn't getting enough. With this next bump I am planning to do top-ups from day 1. He started going to half days at nursery when he was 16 months and has enjoyed it and his speech has improved (his sharing hasn't). He has a dummy which I'm hoping to stop soon-ish and he had a bottle at bedtime until he was just under 2. He still has milk before bed if he wants it and a whole big sippy cup full in the morning, sometimes two.

He's a very happy, I think intelligent, little boy and has been deemed the politest boy the nursery have ever had. I think he is very adaptable to growing up (he accepted the switch from bottle to sippy-cup with little complaint) and is good at letting me know what he needs. So at 26 months when he would repeatedly cry in the mornings and struggle against having a nappy put on whilst shouting 'I don't want nappies anymore' I thought it best to start potty training. Originally I had planned to wait until he was at least 2 ½ so we could get it done in three or four days because he would have a better understanding of what was going on. But he was successfully using the training seat when sat on it and so we went out and chose some Thomas the Tank Engine and Peppa Pig pants and went home to start.

It started well with a few accidents but mostly success but a weekend away from home with certain unanticipated distractions and he completely relapsed. Hated going to the loo and said he wanted his nappies back. Having been a firm believer that once you had started you had to persevere I didn't want to quit but when he was just happily walking around in wet trousers on day 5 having just refused to go to the loo I though 'enough is enough'. I would never have started this early without him wanting to give it a try - it was making me frustrated and this frustration was beginning to show and I don't want this to become an ordeal for both of us that goes on for months.

So he's back in nappies and I feel like a failure. Yes I do think he's too young and I probably should have stuck with that belief. Was I selfish thinking it would be better to get this done before the new baby arrives and we move house? He's adaptable but those are big changes. Will he now be off the whole idea until he's 4 (too old in my opinion though some may disagree)? If he hadn't had a disrupted weekend would he have stayed on track or was success actually just luck because it was just me and him? Though I am always supported by my husband potty training is such a personal thing (many an hour spent playing in the bathroom over the last week) that I now feel very alone with my decisions. I'm not sure how long it will take me to pick up from this.
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2 comments

  1. Don't worry - he's had a go & didn't like it for now, that's fair enough. You know he's young yet. Mine refused until he was nearly three, at which point I bribed him with chocolate and he was done in three days.
    It's better to have a go and a blip now than have him dry only to regress when babe arrives. :) x

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  2. Thank you! He's done it now - still the odd accident but much better than last time. His nursery said he was ready about a month ago and went for it and he's been great! Still feel it would have been better to wait until he was older to avoid regressing etc but pretty impressed he's been so amazing about it

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